teacher! see my pretty buttons!

at the beginning of my blog, i wrote "Lizza, your blog may be about the beginnings of adulthood, but my blog is still about surviving college... haha." But it has since evolved into the beginnings of adulthood despite my first impressions of my writings. I think I've grown a lot over the last year, and especially this summer - I became used to being a college graduate. I made my schedule. I worked full time. I slept and ate and looked like an adult, talked like an adult. (except for the brief times that I was in maryland- but even maryland wasnt bad) (thank you, Lizza, for getting married and helping mom and dad to not treat us like 13 year olds)

beginning of the semester. All these bright eyed, bushy tailed college freshmen. Was I really that young? My thoughts were sentimental and nostalgic, watching them take baby steps into independance. I briefly wished for those days back.

Then classes started. And my professors said the same things. The same. Old. Usual. Things. We. frickin. know. by. now.

And an old professor imitated the pubescent voice of a disorganized young college student "but professor, i lost the form." I watched this, thinking - "wow. what do you really think of kids my age?"

(Most) professors don't have high expectations of their students. And if they have any sort of expectations, they don't have respect.

Arnold Schoenburg, known for the New Viennese School of music (maybe best known for developing 12-tone theory), wrote a textbook, Theory of Harmony - but the preface is a lovely! article about teaching and comfort and... a lot of other things, but there was a quote that really stood out to me.

"But the teacher must have the courage to admit his own mistakes. He does not have to pose as infallible, as one who knows all and never errs; he must rather be tireless, constantly searching,perhaps sometimes finding. Why pose as a demigod? Why not be, rather, fully human?"

I love this. So many teachers, out of insecurity, don't admit when they're wrong, or even that they are capable. Perhaps they think if they admit mistakes, they get too chummy and too much on the level of the student, therefore losing the students respect.

So in my transition from student to teacher -

where is the balance? Where is the fine line that a teacher must stay on? I have a professor who has done it. But I can't see specifically what he does that makes him different, just that he is. different.

Later in that abovementioned preface, Schoenberg says "A teacher who does not exert himself, because he tells only 'what he knows', does not exert his pupils either. Action must start with the teacher himself; his unrest must infect the pupils. Then they will search as he does."

maybe that's the key.